A Lot Like Love..
Has strike a chord in me.. I felt a lump in my throat, its not really because the movie moved me so much but to fall in love all over again with a person who's there all along over a span of time its really something,
haizz can it possibly happen..? Right now, i am comfortable where i am but sometimes i wonder if im just kidding myself waiting for something that is not even so sure yet..

It can be painstakingly tedious, espcially when the person you care for is just right in front of you, but nothing can be done yet for i am too afraid that the slightest broach might ruin everything that is good right now..

But how can i endure the void that i prolong inside me..?
For all the smiles,
For all the laughter,
That ive shown
And for all,
the pretense that it dont really matter anymore
was just my disguise..?
You'll never know that it still hurt as much inside
You'll never know just how much i will love to run over to you and wrap my arms around you
You'll never know just how much i want to tell you that this time it will be different
You'll never know how excruciating it is not being able to express how i really feel
or
You'll never know how difficult for me to be around you espcially when there are lines being drawn

But alas, im still afraid
I ask myself, is the pain pent up inside me and the walls that i built around me knowing it can crumble anytime given its due, worth all the risk? just hoping that in given time and patience, that you realise how much you really mean the world to me..?

Pondering if this is a lot like love..?
To suffer how lethal it is before we finally give in what's beckoning inside our hearts and live happily ever after..?

Then i suppose,i can still go on pretending and be content with the way things are now ..

++++++++++++++

Pardon this entry..
Cant help im missing something when in actual truth he's just within my reach but untouchable..

Haizz otherwise, im good, chirpy and bubbly.. just that sometimes the emptiness i hide it well inside crept up when at the most unexpected moments and you cant curb it..

**Oh and yes the Song Iris that is playing explains a lot how i feel, and obviously on repeat mode everyday.. sighh