When a man tells you he is trying to be a better man,
He doesn't really mean he is trying to be a better man for you,
BUT
For you and the other ladies.
Literally.

It works that way for him.
He gets to choose.
He gets to pick.
He gets to be confuse.
He gets to lie in your face.
He gets all the fun of being worship by all the helpless women who thinks he is godsent.
You cannot refrain him from doing so because he will assume you are suffocating his life.

So what is your conclusion?

The conclusion is screaming right in your ears. Be a fool you shalt not. Flush him out of your life.

But the hurt and anguish?

Oh yes, the hurt and anguish. The instances which you recalled meant a lot to you in some ways then came the pain of realising it meant nothing to him,zilch. To recoil in your own solitary world might be the best thing to do,yes dwell on it for awhile if you have to.

Until when?

Until it hits you that he is nothing but just another man who thinks of no one but only himself.
Who always thinks he has been misunderstood. Uh huh, not sexy at all. That does not make him intellectually interesting. He is getting boring for you and no longer a challenge.

This is my current state of mind if you know what I mean.

I want to get to choose
I want to get my own pick
I want to be confuse
I want to lie in his face
I want to have all the fun of being worship by silly men who thinks I'm a goddess.

Oh I always had it but I was deluded into thinking that 'the man who mentioned he is trying to be a better man' could some day be that better man.

With all that said, I'm coming out to play. No more not picking up calls from men who's fighting to have a sincere conversations with me, I'll make sure I will entertain them with my wit. Oh and if they are lucky I'll make sure they get their own customised initials too. And yes no more 'im sorry im busy tonight', ill make myself available if they offered a decent dinner with a movie session as a package.

Sounds like a slut? Heh, well men do it all the time. Why should we feel guilty?

Im starting tomorrow actually. I'm meeting the man who never fails to make my heart race a million faster each time I listen to him.

And to you you and you, who has been saying what has become of this blog (yes you baidah;) I promise to reveal who this man is.. Soonest! Our first official couple photo.

Hold your breath! Till then!

(*Just the need to vent what is penting up inside the chest. I'll be cool in about 5 mins after this entry is publish. Yeps Im crazy like that.)

Let me end this lengthy entry since a while with..

Hello World!