I wrote this almost a month back on the 23/09/06 :
Ive never felt so dumb and demoralised in my entire life as i am feeling right now..
I was never a failure and even if i know that i cant i will always make my way up either way or another.
But this..today, ive never felt so despaired. I was engulfed in frustation, my head spinning at the repercussion. And all i wanted to do was just let my tears flow.
But it doesnt mean anyone has a right to give me a hard time.
No one knows how fcukin hard i tried and the multiples of effort that i had put in. Even i cant explain my own failing.
It's already done much damage to my ego thank you very much and i simply do need anyone to let me know that i am a loser.
Save yourself the trouble because i have already acknowledge that myself.
******************
But now i cant stop myself smiling gleefully like this
Just because perseverance, determination, driven passion with a tinge of immune-ness plus feeling gloomy and upset on a bad day can give you unexpected result that totally baffled you! I had to confirm twice and totally felt perky after I saw that it was indeed true!
It does pay off you know, moral of the story DO NOT give up easily although it has taken a toll on you. At the end of the day, it felt great as i smile and dance all the way home with triumph written all over my face :)
But of course la,those who knows what im talking about will say "Duh like finally! What took you so long!"..Heh it's okay at least i got here eventually, doesn't matter if it took me 100 times ;)
Ive never felt so dumb and demoralised in my entire life as i am feeling right now..
I was never a failure and even if i know that i cant i will always make my way up either way or another.
But this..today, ive never felt so despaired. I was engulfed in frustation, my head spinning at the repercussion. And all i wanted to do was just let my tears flow.
But it doesnt mean anyone has a right to give me a hard time.
No one knows how fcukin hard i tried and the multiples of effort that i had put in. Even i cant explain my own failing.
It's already done much damage to my ego thank you very much and i simply do need anyone to let me know that i am a loser.
Save yourself the trouble because i have already acknowledge that myself.
******************
But now i cant stop myself smiling gleefully like this
Just because perseverance, determination, driven passion with a tinge of immune-ness plus feeling gloomy and upset on a bad day can give you unexpected result that totally baffled you! I had to confirm twice and totally felt perky after I saw that it was indeed true!
It does pay off you know, moral of the story DO NOT give up easily although it has taken a toll on you. At the end of the day, it felt great as i smile and dance all the way home with triumph written all over my face :)
But of course la,those who knows what im talking about will say "Duh like finally! What took you so long!"..Heh it's okay at least i got here eventually, doesn't matter if it took me 100 times ;)